its the end of the world as we know it...

a bit extreme perhaps, but certainly closer to how i am feeling these last few days. today is grad. tomorrow i never see most of these people again. my heart is getting ripped out, once again. i remember before this school started, wondering why i said yes, when i knew that once it was over i would be miserable knowing that i just went though this all over again. can i curl up in a ball on the floor and block everything out and just cry? that exactly how ive felt at the end of every school, and why would this be any exception? this is probably the worst. these students have found a place in my heart that is only for them, and the last five months have been such a joy, exploring who they are, and coming alongside them and championing them further into their destiny with Jesus. what a freaking privilege! as im typing this, all of their faces are running in front of my eyes, and i JUST DONT WANT TO SAY GOODBYE!! :( not many dts staff could say this, but i wish i could spend another five months with them. the thing i think about most is the first three months, the lecture phase. seeing brand new people coming to a place they really have no idea about, searching for God and not knowing whats about to happen, to see them wrestle through issues, pasts, hurts, and identities to come to a place of love like they have never experienced is something to be cherished. every single student has taught me a valuable lesson, and im so freaking blessed to live this life, how did i get so lucky? i love you Lord! i just don't know what to say, theres so much on my heart, but i can hardly squeeze the words out. maybe in a few days, when all of my emotions have calmed, and im over stupid jet-lag, ill try again...