All Things Youth

I noticed that I have been talking a bit about the youth ministry, how about some visual aids to go along that theme? I'm pretty sure I will be blogging a lot more about the ministry, and/or the students, and what God is doing, so I hope you enjoy...




Youth Group...we had to play an intense memory game...our team won!



Balloon-blowing...NOT my favorite...but still fun! We won that one too!


Paul speaking during Sunday night Youth Group, getting ready for worship.



The High School Leadership Retreat at Mount Hermon, wahoo!



The High School Mission Trip to Vancouver, Canada.By far our favorite past-time!



Courtney (also a leader), Holly, Me, and Brent during our servant Evangelism day. There is an older blog about teh trip that goes into detail about this day.




Our small group! Very small, hehe...

A Giver of Good Gifts

This weekend I stumbled upon a favorite passage of scripture:

Luke 11: 11-12
11"Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? 12 Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? 13 If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!"

It's been in the back of my head for the last few days, and I even re-read it this morning.
It turns out it was a pretty good day for this verse!
A few days ago my parents said that they were going to hook the cable/dvr up in my room. In all honesty, I think they are doing it for themselves more than me (and it costs them nothing extra, just the installation fee), so we don't have to fight over the tv all the time. In my room I have a teeny tiny 13 inch box tv that is positively ancient, and I only ever use it if I can't sleep at night and want to watch a movie, it gets no channels at all.

Anyway, tonight me and dad were on our own for dinner, and we weren't really hungry at the time we left, so dad said we should go check out TV's. So we did.
My father, who is a giver of good gifts, suddenly buys me a 26 inch, flat-screen LCD HDTV.

I have done nothing to deserve this! I am not worthy, I am not in any way deserving of something so grand. And yet my daddy, who loves me more than anything else in this world, does this great thing for me, simply becuase he loves me.

Thinking about this, how much GREATER are the gifts that the Lord gives us?! And notice He doesn't say 'gifts', He says the Holy Spirit, which apparently is the GREATEST gift of all. Receiving the Holy Spirit = Greatest Gift. Hmmm.
What does that look like, receiving the Holy Spirit? Well, I can only speak for myself, and at this point, I won't, so if you are reading this you can ask God for yourself. :)

My dad is the world's greatest. He has sacrificed so much in his life so that I won't have to. He has bested all the odds stacked against him to succeed greatly in his life. He provides everything I need, and most everything I want (I'm his baby girl, he's still wrapped around my finger! Though I promise I did absolutely nothing to provoke this wonderful event!).
My daddy is a giver of good gifts.
So is my Jesus.
I love my daddy...
simply because he loves me first.

Sleepless In Vacaville

I'm tired. Exhausted might be closer to the truth, but I just can not manage to turn my brain off and calm my body down. I am wide awake. At 1 in the morning. I have to wake up soon. Dang.

I spent this last weekend in the Santa Cruz mountains, attending the Senior High Leadership Retreat at Mount Hermon. I attended once before, several years ago, and it was fun to go back and experience somewhat the same thing, just with new people...whom I love :)

It was fun being a leader, watching the students take on leadership responsibilities within the youth group. Watching them slowly starting to realize that we believe in them, and want to treat them as adults (when they act like it ;) was pretty awesome. It is interesting to me to see how down on themselves teenagers are, and I think a big part of it might be that parents, and really society, do not give them enough credit and the chance to take ownership over things. Granted, moody teenagers can only handle so much, but I think we forget that in this time when they are starting to truly develop themselves, actively ask themselves who they are, and struggle through the challenges that life throws at them that ultimately helps guide their character, for the most part, the more responsibility we give them, the more responsible they want to be.
Just a thought.

Today I spent a few lovely hours sitting in my favorite Starbucks, sipping my second favorite brew, talking with one of my favorite people. Courtney Ronald is pretty awesome.
We talked all over the place, but generally our words were centered around God, faith, and what our lives look like with Jesus at the center. I really can't imagine a better way to spend my time...well, that's a lie (I could be traveling to some exotic country sharing the love of Jesus after all), but it is most certainly one of my favorite ways!

We talked a lot about our weaknesses, and for the sake of vulnerability and transparency, two things I value, I will discuss them here. Though the list probably never ends, for any of us, I'm pretty sure I wont hit on everything...

One of my biggest downfalls is negativity. I am SUCH a positive person, I ALWAYS view EVERYTHING positively, and always focus on drawing out the good in everything and everyone. I think sometimes this is to a fault, and I do not always have the best grasp on reality because of it, but I just do NOT understand why people would choose to go through life so down and depressed when they don't have to. When talking with someone who tends to spin things negatively, my reaction in the past has been to walk away, and avoid them entirely. That is definitely NOT the way Jesus wants us to interact with one another, and I really want to work on that, but I am just not sure how, really. I think one thing may be to realize that there is something deeper going on than I know, and not to "judge a book by it's cover" and write someone off like I know everything that is going on. People are worth it, period.

I don't think this one falls so much under the category of weaknesses, but it's something I struggle with, and that counts. I struggle a LOT with trying to find the balance between living up to the truth I know, and not being some 'over-spiritual' know-it-all, horridly annoying Christian. There are certain foundations that I have built, certain truths I have walked through, and many faith issues that I know to be true, and I can't, and don't want, to deny or downplay that. Even more, though, I do NOT want to be that person who always makes people feel bad about themselves, and come across as if I'm judging people because they are doing wrong. Where is the balance between accountability and judgement?
Could it be love?
How do I accurately portray that?

I hope this doesn't read as some down on myself, needs encouragement blog, because it is not. Positivity is a good thing, because I know that I am a wonderful person, and I have SO much to add and offer to life, and it is all because of Jesus. What love to live in!

Well, my eyes are feeling twice as large as they are, hopefully the net few minutes will find me drifting blissfully off to the land of the unconscious...au revoire...

Thoughts, I guess.

So tonight was the first night of small groups. I'm co-leading (apparently I have an apprentice!) a group for senior high girls, 11-12 grade. It was a casual night, everyone hanging out and getting to know each other mostly. There are three groups, 9-10 grade girls, 11-12 grade girls, and one big guys group. We all meet at one of the students homes, and split up from there. We only had one girl in our group, so it was fun just being together and getting to know each other a bit better.

One thing I have been thinking about lately are the qualities of a leader. What does the world say a leader should be? What does Jesus say a leader should be? Looking at it, sometimes they coincide, other times they are the opposite spectrum.
I could go on and on, comparing and contrasting ideas from the two, going in depth with explanations and definitions, but mostly, it's too late and I'm too tired.

Praying about it, the only thing I can do is hold myself accountable to what Jesus is asking of me. And what He is asking of me looks different than what He is asking of my leader, my friend, my parents, you. I have to constantly be submitting my entire self to Him, seeking Him over me, in every way. And truly, that is the only content place to be. It's not always comfortable, most often times it is not, but I just can not get away from it, being in the center of God's will is the only place I want to rest.

What would it look like if we all sought after that with all our hearts, and didn't stop until we achieved it? What would it look like if we truly understood what the love of God means, what it looks like? How much MORE we would truly love our neighbor, and ourselves.
I want to be a person of love. I want to love truly, and with abandon.

yikes...its been awhile!

Wow, i didn't realize how much time has passed since my last entry, I apologize! I guess this might be a bit random...

What are these days finding me doing?

- Watching all four seasons of lost ( I finally caught up today)
- Looking for a job (I interviewed at the library today!)
- Cooking dinner for the family...tonight we had Curried Chicken With Cashews and farre.
- Scrapbooking my many adventures abroad...I just finished this last trip to Thailand and the Philippines.
- Getting myself dug deep with the Youth Ministry at church. This year I will be leading a small group of 11-12 grade high school girls. I am also on the Missions Committee, and my personal agenda on there, among others, is to see our church going international with adult short-term mission trips. Get the Word out.
- trying to keep myself busy, my basic only schedule right now involves people only. It's not bad, but I'm ready for a bit of work and education in there as well.

What is going through my head right now?

I am pondering the love of God. It is a pretty endless conversation to be having, I suppose. The discovery and journey of love is endless, and will always trump over everything else that tries to stand in it's way...I think I am thinking that because I can hear my dad watching the original Star Wars on T.V., and isn't Star Wars all about good versus evil? It just seems to me so blatantly obvious that that fundamental war is biblically based, and so many metaphors are thrown at you throughout that saga.
...tangent (on Star Wars?)...sorry.

I have been thinking lately. I have been thinking about leadership. About being a leader. Being a leader is a big deal, a very big deal. I think too often it is not taken seriously enough, and failure ensues. You are responsible over every aspect of a person, and it is your duty to protect them, to see them grow. I think it doesn't matter if it is "spiritual" or not.

I'm sorry this isn't more cogent, I think I have been in a place lately of discovery, of figuring out my life now that I am here at home, and while it has been a fairly un-eventful transition, (thank you Lord!), there is so much I am trying to establish a foundation on here at home.
I think the big thing is the balance between living up to the truth, Word, and knowledge I know and have learned, and not being so over-bearing that I turn others away. After all , I want my life to be about living in the love of Jesus, and pointing others in that direction by the way I choose to live, I don't want to be labeled some 'over-spiritual christian', that really turns me off. It isn't about religion, it's about relationship...

First John Four. Love.

Come close listen to the story
About a love more faithful than the morning
The Father gave his only son just to save us

The earth was shaking in the dark
All creation felt the Father's broken heart
Tears were filling heaven's eyes
The day that true love died, the day that true love died
When blood and water hit the ground
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down
We were free and made alive
The day that true love died, the day that true love died

Search your heart, you know you can't deny it
Come on, lose your life just so you can find it
The Father gave his only son just to save us

The earth was shaking in the dark
All creation felt the father's broken heart
Tears were filling heaven's eyes
The day that true love died, the day that true love died
When blood and water hit the ground
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down
We were free and made alive
The day that true love died, the day that true love died

Now Jesus is alive
Jesus is alive
Jesus is alive
Jesus is alive
Jesus is alive
oh He is alive
He rose again

When blood and water hit the ground
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down
We were free and made alive
The day that true love died, the day that true love died

Come close listen to the story
phil wickham




this is what i live for, this is what my life is all about. the very core of who i am, who we are, is this. everything i am, everything i do, everything i say, everything i think, i want to flow from this source. love. reality.
the only thing in life that makes complete sense.
what a privilege.
what a romance.
for us.

God Is Love
7-10My beloved friends, let us continue to love each other since love comes from God. Everyone who loves is born of God and experiences a relationship with God. The person who refuses to love doesn't know the first thing about God, because God is love—so you can't know him if you don't love. This is how God showed his love for us: God sent his only Son into the world so we might live through him. This is the kind of love we are talking about—not that we once upon a time loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to clear away our sins and the damage they've done to our relationship with God.

11-12My dear, dear friends, if God loved us like this, we certainly ought to love each other. No one has seen God, ever. But if we love one another, God dwells deeply within us, and his love becomes complete in us—perfect love!

13-16This is how we know we're living steadily and deeply in him, and he in us: He's given us life from his life, from his very own Spirit. Also, we've seen for ourselves and continue to state openly that the Father sent his Son as Savior of the world. Everyone who confesses that Jesus is God's Son participates continuously in an intimate relationship with God. We know it so well, we've embraced it heart and soul, this love that comes from God.
To Love, to Be Loved
17-18God is love. When we take up permanent residence in a life of love, we live in God and God lives in us. This way, love has the run of the house, becomes at home and mature in us, so that we're free of worry on Judgment Day—our standing in the world is identical with Christ's. There is no room in love for fear. Well-formed love banishes fear. Since fear is crippling, a fearful life—fear of death, fear of judgment—is one not yet fully formed in love.

19We, though, are going to love—love and be loved. First we were loved, now we love. He loved us first.

20-21If anyone boasts, "I love God," and goes right on hating his brother or sister, thinking nothing of it, he is a liar. If he won't love the person he can see, how can he love the God he can't see? The command we have from Christ is blunt: Loving God includes loving people. You've got to love both.
The Message

transitioning and other things

my life is in a transition. in one week, i will pack up my life. in a week and a half, i will be driving home, back to vacaville, for good. well, for now. i feel like God is calling me home to finish school, and to take part in the ripple effect youth ministry at my church. right now, i am still at the ywam la base, finishing up my responsibilities and commitments here before heading home. for the last month, ive almost felt like ive been torn in two, with half of me at home, and half of me here. im just ready to be home and settled already! im ready for school, to get back in the swing of things, to dump loads of information into my brain too quickly, to take years to process through it all, and constantly be surprised by situations im in that utilize the information i thought i would never even remember. im ready to pour my heart into the students in the youth group, to pray for them and watch God answer those prayers, to get his heart for the ministry and come alongside Gods vision and do my part to champion Gods beautiful people further into their kingdom destinies.
i was introduces to this crazy video, and my life will never be the same, i hope you enjoy it too :)